Hi hi

Oct. 17th, 2015 12:26 am
anonymousblueberry: The Midnighter from The Authority grinning manically (Midnighter would like to offer you pain)
Is this thing on? I have no idea, it's been years, what the fuck am I doing back here? I've been blogging crafts over at Confessions of an Anonymous Blueberry for about a year now, which has been kind of cool. It's nice to be making stuff, it's nice to see a visible improvement of what I'm doing. My knitting tension still sucks and I'm still terrible at following instructions, but we're getting somewhere, and it's strangely therapeutic. I post way too many stupid photos over on Instagram as well.

Life is err, lifelike. I think. I was seeing a guy, it was good, it was casual, I fucked it up about a year ago and this afternoon panicked when I nearly ran into him in town. I miss the sex and having someone who would go to the pub and talk crap with me. I'm not convinced I miss the baggage that came with him.

I've barely written anything since last year (breakup occurred mid-NaNo, and if that doesn't fuck with the creative process, I'm not sure what does). I'm planning on doing NaNo this year to try and break the rut, but I'm not holding out a lot of hope.

Work sucks, more and more responsibility with no recognition and more chance of being thrown under the train (almost literally, fucking rail company) and no chance of a pay rise. I'd get out, but the pay is sadly high enough that I'm not going to find anything similar locally.

LARP is, err, LARP. Local LARP continues to be a minefield of people being dickheads and some lovely people. We've got a lot of people out with illness and injury this year, which has made it slow and frustrating, and we're down to very low numbers.
Crewing Empire is fun and the fact that people seem to think I'm competent continues to terrify me. My character died at Odyssey in a thoroughly stupid and Greek manner, and I'm planning the replacement (but only for two more events, and then it's all over! Nooooo!)

I'm thinking I'm going to try and keep this updated a bit more regularly. FB is fine for quick rants at people I know, and the blog is good for crafting, and Tumblr is cool for fandom (which I'm back to lurking in in the lurkiest way possible) but I vaguely miss DW/LJ and I'm going to be honest, I'm going through one of my massive down phases, so having somewhere to brain vomit might not be a bad thing.
anonymousblueberry: Fili in Bag End with a plate in his hand, looking a little bit diva-ish (Fili is a plate throwing diva)
Medium: Books/Film
Fandom: The Hobbit
Subject: The Company of Thorin Oakenshield
Title: Lost Graces
Warnings: Possibly spoilery if you haven't read the book.
Notes: I have no idea and no excuse.

I've been meaning to post this for about a month, it's been up on 8tracks for a while, and on tumblr, but I keep forgetting to put it here.

You say my time here has been some sort of joke )


May. 28th, 2013 11:17 pm
anonymousblueberry: (Freya is broken)
I have managed to poke myself in the eye or something ridiculous and now they're both manky and swollen and goopy. To be fair, they were pretty bad before (if anyone ever tells you you have blepharitis but that it's really easy to control, they're fucking lying) but now they're hideous and I can't even fucking cry without them stinging.
On the up side I've managed to find the wipes I need for them. On the downside, using them means I pretty much can't see anything for a few minutes after I've used them.


(life is dull)
anonymousblueberry: Brendan from Thought Crimes holding an icepack to his head (Icepacks are Brendan's must have item)
I'm mostly over on Tumblr these days on account of pretty things and a rampant lack of desire to say anything to anyone apart from inane squee. But some days I do need to whinge...

*cries* I have been useless all day today. I got in late last night after gaming, went to bed with a nosebleed, slept through all my alarms and woke up with a stinking headache. I was forced out of bed by some overly cheerful charity person banging on my door. Headache did not go away.

I read lots, did nothing, and eventually crawled up the shop for food.

Had pasta and sauce and garlic bread, which I knew would make me ill, but I wanted it so I ate it. And now I still feel like utter shit. Fuck you parsley. Why must you be so fucking cruel?
anonymousblueberry: Fili in Bag End with a plate in his hand, looking a little bit diva-ish (Fili is a plate throwing diva)
I am in this position where there is a job that I want being dangled in front of my face, but I'm scared to really want it, because every time I really want something, I don't get it.
I still love the uni, but it's getting to the point where everyone is crazy and there's so much bullshit going on that it's kind of awkward.
And the new job would be maybe cool, I don't know. I think a lot of it is that I do just really want out of the uni.

(life is currently crazy and annoying and all I want to do is the stuff that I don't have time to do, as usual)
anonymousblueberry: Fili in Bag End with a plate in his hand, looking a little bit diva-ish (Fili is a plate throwing diva)
I'm writing pro and con lists about current job and potential new job. And it's making me fucking miserable because I love my current job but the office politics are really starting to get to me, and I had been hoping that I could do both (both are part time) but that isn't going to work.

I don't know how to be a grown up and it sucks.

I would like to be throwing things, but instead I shall use my icon of Fili throwing stuff, which is almost as good.
anonymousblueberry: The Midnighter from The Authority grinning manically (Midnighter would like to offer you pain)
It's fairly safe to say that February is a shit month for me, for a multitude of reasons. This year, in all, hasn't actually been that bad, but apparently now, as I sit on the cusp of it turning to March, I have flipped from being relatively mellow to the desperate need to punch someone's face in. It totally makes sense (or not).

Work is hell, as evidenced by the fact that I got sent to Moulton campus for the afternoon today with about an hour's notice. I got lucky on the buses (but not so lucky that I bumped into current object of pointless lusting #1) and actually managed to get there in time. I sat through one lecture, had lunch, and then found that the second lecture had just vanished. No idea what happened there (there are a couple of theories, which suck for the student, but I really can't be bothered to complain as I still get paid and it meant I could get a sensible bus home instead of having to get the uni service to Park campus and then the bus from there home).

I have done approximately nothing this evening. I couldn't even be bothered to cook a proper dinner. I'm watching Being Human from the start (I tried watching it when it first started and could not get into it, apparently I have grown, or something, or I am just that fucking shallow...)
I'm also rationing myself on The Almighty Johnsons. I have 3 more episodes to watch, and while I am spoiled, I am unwilling to finish. Also the fact that I'm going to have to watch it on my computer as my TV has decided it doesn't like that file type or some such nonsense. The same goes for Game of Thrones. Ugh.

I have a desperate want to put together a new character for some sort of LARP. Actually, I just want to do costuming things, which is ridiculous. I want to make stuff, but I have so little time, and I am so drained by work at the moment that when I get in, the best I can do is make dinner and zone out in front of the TV or computer, which does my head in.

And that seems to be my life at the moment.

Go me.
anonymousblueberry: Icon of the Carrier on a blue backgorund (The Carrier in memory fish)
Medium: Comics
Fandom: The Authority
Subject: Jenny Sparks, spirit of the 20th century
Title: And the mother of gloom
Warnings: Contains swearing, which kind of goes with the territory. I'm not going to warn for spoilers, but needless to say, it will probably spoil you if you haven't read any of the original run of The Authority
Notes: I love Jenny Sparks, she's basically my comic book hero (which is a terrible thing to say really), but whatever. The music here isn't period appropriate, nor does it cover all of her life.

You say my time here has been some sort of joke )
anonymousblueberry: John Sheppard leaning over with an arrow pointing to his arse captioned "female gaze" (Subject to the female gaze)
I spent pretty much all of yesterday editing setting info for the LARP system and today holds much of the same. This does not please me as photoshop and ficwriting are calling.

And all of this is dependent on my getting out from under my pile of blankets. It's snowing. Again.
anonymousblueberry: The Midnighter from The Authority grinning manically (Midnighter would like to offer you pain)
I had a brief half hour or so this evening (that may have been prompted by how foul I felt after eating pizza) of misery.
Because mum never got to see The Lord of the Rings films. Nor will she ever see the Hobbit films. Whether she would have cared or not, I'm not entirely sure, she was fairly ambivalent to the Fellowship of the Ring when it came out (although that could be said to be her attitude towards pretty much everything by that point). I vaguely remember her mocking my Sean Bean thing, and I'm fairly sure she made approving noises about Viggo Mortensen, but I am fairly sure she would approve of Richard Armitage.

What's weird is that I know I had a copy of The Hobbit when I was little (I still have it, it's illustrated with some really trippy illustrations) but I don't remember who read it to me. I assume mum, but I'm not entirely sure, and I don't like asking dad that sort of thing as he gets a bit weird (understandably) and there is always the chance that I read it to myself once I got old enough to do anything other than just look at the pictures.

Anyway, that was the cheer for the evening. I've spent most of the evening editing content for updates for the LARP system, I said I was going to bed about an hour ago, and then got distracted.

Sleep, I hear it is good for you...